As much as we think the article has an air of humour about it, we also thought that there were some valuable messages in there too. We hope you enjoy it as much as we did.
10 Annoying Things That Men Do (Or Are They Endearing?)
Men make up around half the population and the other half seem to get annoyed by them most of the time.
What is it that men do that is so annoying?
Maybe you love men and find their little habits endearing and lovable? Here are the habits that I see that women find difficult to take:
1. Men Turn Off Their Brains!
This is something my wife still finds extraordinary. She knows I do it and she, now, understands it’s a necessary part of men focusing, but she, somehow, can’t quite believe it. I just switch off from whatever I am doing, or whatever is happening and go into space, or my ‘nothing box’.
One of the great qualities that men have is their ability to focus and be directed in what they do. I suppose it comes from man as hunter when he needed to focus for hours, or days, on catching his prey. Much of the work and achievement of men comes from this narrow view. Having spent all day doing this, men just want to empty out when they get home and think of absolutely nothing.
Advice For Men:
Think about when you do this. Does your partner need some attention? Could you do this another time? Have you explained what’s happening to your partner?
2. Men Are So Bound Up In Their Ego!
OK, it’s true! Men are bound up in their ego! The classic story from all women, it seems, is the one where the man is driving and reading the map (because we all know women can’t!) but still manages to get lost. He drives around for hours saying that he knows he is almost there. The problem is he doesn’t stop and ask directions from people around, that would mean admitting he is lost.
Men are bound up in their masculinity, or lack of it. They live by power and strength and they believe in hierarchy. The pecking order is achieved by winning small battles on the road to success. This only happens if men refuse to admit defeat. He plays the game of chicken in life. The first one to falter loses. Road rage is a classic case of this.
Advice For Men:
Is this really necessary for you? It is important to choose your battles and not let life be one great battle, with yourself or others. Let go of your ego and let life flow.
3. Men are selfish and detached!
It’s true that men detach, but the idea that they are selfish is one that isn’t true, generally. John Gray in his book, ‘Men are from Mars, Women from Venus’, talks about an elastic band that draws men away from emotional commitment and bounces them back in again. I prefer the idea of a rhythm of masculinity where men fluctuate in their emotional connection.
I know my emotional connection to my wife seems to grow stronger and weaker over time. This is not, however, because there is any variation in the connection itself, it’s because my mind and attention can only hold so much at any one time. My focus goes on whatever project I am working on and I need to drag myself back to be attentive emotionally. It’s all bound up with the logical male brain, solutions come before emotions.
Advice For Men:
Be aware that you are doing this. When your partner accuses you of being distant accept that it may be true. Find time every day to bring yourself back to her and connect with her emotionally. Let your work for a time.
4. Men Snore!
Guilty as charged. I do it and I wake up the whole household when I do it. My father was a bad case as well. I remember that my mother used to get up very early in the morning when she could stand it no more. She could always be found downstairs in the kitchen drinking a cup of tea when she should have been in bed.
It is a fact that men do it far more than women and that most men seem to have no idea what to do about it, other than annoy their partner.
I have solved it, however, much to my wife’s relief. I went to the doctor who sent me to a specialist. I did a sleep test at the hospital and was diagnosed with ‘Obstructive Sleep Apnoea ’. What this means is that I am on the verge of dying every few minutes when I am ‘asleep’ because my airway closes. That explained my tiredness and irritability. I now use a CPAP (Constant Positive Air Pressure) machine that gently blows air into my nose and keeps my airway open. No more snoring, much better dreaming.
Advice For Men:
Don’t just accept it, go to a doctor and get it seen to. The difference for me was transformational. I thoroughly recommend it.
5. Men Read On The Toilet!
Why do men do this? I have no answer other than they do. I know I do. Maybe I want to detach from what I am doing, maybe I want escape from the outside world, maybe I am just bored sitting there. I don’t get bored easily but I don’t spend a lot of time doing nothing. I enjoy reading in the ‘loo’. In my earlier years I had a collection of joke books in there that could be read in small bites.
Advice For Men:
Don’t believe that this is a problem. Enjoy yourself but make sure your partner doesn’t need to urgently go while you are spending hours in there.
6. Men Are So Logical!
Isn’t it great? Aren’t you relieved that at least someone is logical! How would you get on in life if everyone just dived in and followed their intuitive response.
Men are reputed to be more left-brained, more linear in their thinking. On average this may seem to be true because much of the work that men do is linear and logical. This view denies the large numbers of creative men for whom ideas and concepts are the currency of their mind. I find that in my working, and thinking, life I am both. I love logic and studied maths as a result. Yet I found that in studying maths it was the wild, conceptual side of pure maths that I loved.
Advice For Men:
This is OK, for you. Don’t expect others to think logically as well, though. In particular don’t expect women to be logical and don’t criticise them when they aren’t.
7. Men Are Always Solving Problems!
Men don’t even realise they’re doing this, they think it’s how everyone behaves. They see life as a series of problems to be solved one by one. Men create success at work by solving problems and finding new ways to do things.
I have created enormous success in my life by being a great problem solver. I worked in the theatre and in architectural lighting design and I succeeded by being creative in my problem solving. In many ways I see creativity as just another way of looking at a situation, another way of solving a problem. Many women find this behaviour extremely annoying and hate that men see their personal life in the same way they see their working life.
Advice For Men:
Try not to see all of life this way. Often your partner just wants to talk so that you listen, just listen. She doesn’t want her issues solved, they’re not problems for her. She only wants acknowledgement.
8. Men Scratch Their Balls!
We scratch our balls! We can’t deny it!
Women find it offensive and rude. Often they also find it far too suggestive. The truth is they cannot understand why we spend so much time scratching. They accuse us of having to keep checking that they are still there… of being obsessed with them.
The truth is they have no idea what it’s like having your ‘crown jewels’ hanging around between your legs. I know there is a good physical reason why we were designed this way, but I am sure god could have done a better job of it. You see they get caught in awkward ways, they end up in uncomfortable positions, they get squashed and pushed around. Every time we walk or sit or stand or move or…. they move and get caught. They itch, they feel sensitive, they are just a nuisance outside of sex. We have to live with them all the time, though.
Advice For Men:
Be discreet about it. Don’t do it publicly. Try to consider the sensibilities of the women you are with. I know they’re awkward, just get over it.
9. Men Have Facial Hair!
Men grow hair in places they’d sooner not. As they get older it starts sprouting out of ears and nose and…
I have had a beard for most of my life and I am proud of it. I do, however, keep it, and the rest, trimmed. Well sort of… Do you know what it’s like scraping a razor across your face every day? I have better things to do so I grow a beard. It also makes me look distinguished!
There is going too far, though. The Archbishop of Canterbury (see picture) needs to be introduced to a barber, at least. In my view he takes his manly growth a little too seriously, especially the eyebrows, it really is possible to trim them.
Advice For Men:
It’s OK to be proud of your beard or moustache, but do consider trimming them. Just imagine what it’s like for a woman to be scratched and scraped whenever you want to show affection.
10. Men Are So Scruffy!
This really is my pet peeve! Men seem to think that it is manly to be scruffy. Somehow walking around in the clothes he has slept in seems to be the height of fashion for many men. They also seem to think that a 40 year old with a beer belly can still look smart in jeans and tee shirt. It’s time for men to grow up and realise that fashion is not just for women.
It’s so common to see a wide gap between men and women when they are out together. Mostly women look smart, clean, tidy and well presented. The man with her often has no idea that he looks like a slob beside her. He’s wearing worn jeans, his shirt is hanging out, his jersey is shapeless, as for the stained baseball cap or hat…
Being fashionable is fine, being out of date is not.
Advice For Men:
Look at yourself in the mirror before you go out. Do you look good? Look at your partner, how smart is she? Do you set her off, will you make her proud of you? When your clothes become shapeless throw them out.
NOTE: This article is not an original post by Becoming Better Men. It has been respectfully borrowed from http://malexperience.com/2011/11/10-annoying-things-men/
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